29 October, 2008

Meet Me at the Crossroads

tonight i left early to take a drive along some dark, country roads.
i turned off my music and listened for God. It didn't take me long to start talking.
But it took a while for me to listen.
I sat a a four-way stop.
A little lost
I didn't know which way to go.

It was then that my heart cried out and my ears opened.

34"Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.

Matthew 6:34 (The Message)

This week has been so long! I know that being a pledge and doing all of the activities is hard, difficult stressful and exhausting but all of those words (to a lesser degree) can apply to those already in the club! There are new names to memorize for us and people to get to know and all those books to sign.....AFTER quizzing them about things we need a refrecher course in too! But I do absolutely adore my little sister! She is working so hard around a busy schedule and TESTS! Its nice to see her learn more about ZP as the week progresses. Tomorrow will be FUN!

26 October, 2008

I took a quiz today and this was the result

You are most like MARY MAGDALENE
She was forgiven much & loved much, and you certainly love much! You are a passionate person, who loves God & life. You have a tendency to count your blessings and be very grateful, even in small things. You are an overcomer, and will not allow any life circumstances to hold you down.

Heaven knows I have been forgiven much and I know that I love much but sometimes I dont feel like it. Not that I havent been feeling loved, Im just reminded with each and every sunset that God makes the world beautiful so that I can bear life here until I can live with Him, how wonderful!

25 October, 2008

Out of My Dreams

So Oklahoma! is almost over! I can't believe it. It has been an overall good experience. I have fallen in love with the cast and love the part where the adrenaline starts pumping and everything just flies by! I LOVE IT! Sometimes I forget the part where I am a performer, its simply part of me. I hope that whatever I really end up doing in life, theatre will be a part.
I also can't believe that I am a senior and that even though I will be here another fall semester, this is my last musical with many of the people I started with here at Harding. Growing up is hard to do.

21 October, 2008

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound!
That saved a wretch like me,
I once was lost but now Im found
Was blind but now I see.

Twas Grace that taught my heart to fear and Grace my fears relieved!
How precious was that Grace recieved the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come!
tis Grace thats brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home

When we've been there ten thousand years, bright shining as the sun
Weve no less days to sing Gods praise than when we first begun!

A couple of days ago, that was led at a Bible study I attended. I don't think I have ever needed that song more than at that moment. Or right now, the words are the most simple most beautiful things to descirbe an amazingly complex and awesome God! I am so blessed even in my stress and exhaustion! And I am so excited about following what seems to be the plans that He is laying out for me! Its really nice to let Him guide me....there are more questions but in a certain direction and I am just estatic about it! Once I figure everything out, I will share with the blog-o-sphere....you can ask me personally but in the meantime PRAY! it feels so good!

11 October, 2008

I live life at an eight and thats not fair!

i keep things inside. I stuff them in all the deepest darkest corners and glue them down with hurt. So you see, I have been brooding over them for years. But now, im learning how to hurt....correctly. And its getting harder to hide things because im getting positive reinforcement that my behavior is correct and good for me.

i got all out rejected tonight because of "numbers".

how would you react? i cried. i was hurt. more importantly i actually hurt, inside and not myself. and, if you didnt know....thats a big HUGE thing for me.

and that thing that i was talking about last post? still way excited about it. in prayer and knowing that things will work according to His perfect plan! a purposeful life somewhere....helping!

10 October, 2008

why cant i ask for something i need????

also........theres something im REALLY excited about......it may involve staying at HU for a bit longer (1 semester) but I think Im ok with that.....

05 October, 2008

Im tired and taking the only morning off that i can (cant?) afford. And, now its almost noon and i need to get up and start working on stuff but this, this was nice. I am so ready for
-a massage
-a vacation
-a home-cooked meal