25 January, 2012

Depression sucks. It doesnt hurt me but it sure messes up my life. Just because I can identify that I am feeling blue does't mean I can shake it, turn my frown upside down and be my "old self" again. However, because I can identify that I am feeling blue means that I can try harder to fix my thoughts, to be proactive and not let the depression win. So today I ate, tried to laugh and did my best to remove myself from sadness/let it happen and MOVE ON. If I let it win, if I sit and wallow in depression I end up falling into old habits. I was miserable back then. Here's hoping being proactive is the way to go!

19 January, 2012

Waiting part 2

Wait be patient be still pause rest. Rest assured that I have a plan. Stay. Stay here where I need you to be. abide expect. Expect that the promises I have made for you will come to fruition hold on remain save it. Save those emotions, that love. There IS something in the future. watch stick around. Stick around...watch what happens next! lie in wait anticipate. My plans are HUGE. Far larger than the ones you desire. Anticipate the bigger picture. Did you know that in Hebrew and Spanish, the word for wait is the same? (Spanish is espera)

16 January, 2012


There are many things I have been praying for. So many things my heart desires and I have asked...and quite literally BEGGED...God for.
I have a problem with desiring instant gratification.
I want to know the future now
I would like to know what Gods plans for me are
I want to have someone to love, and to love me in return

I want. I have. I. I. I. What a selfish, unthankful girl that I seem to be from all that! But thats not what I intended to write.

God told me to wait this weekend. Thats it. Wait.
Simple huh?
Did you read everything that I just wrote? Thats CLEARLY the opposite of simple to me. I REALLY had a hard time accepting that Saturday. It put me in a mood. It made me cry. And then I got to worship

Oh Im running to your arms, Im running to your arms. The riches of your love will always be enough. Nothing compares to your embrace. Light of the world forever reign!

Wait for the Lord whose day is near. Wait for the Lord. Be strong, take heart.

Whom you love, I'll love. Who you serve I'll serve in this life I live I will follow you!

After a night of worship like we had, I couldn't help but know that God was the absolute truth and that in the word "wait" was a promise.

Oh daughter, wait. Wait and do not hurry this gift of today. Tomorrows troubles will be numerous, don't rush them. Wait here where I have put you. There is a future for you. But here is where you need to stay. When the time is right. Until then, rest, pause, be content and wait. I never forget a promise.