21 January, 2010


Its what I am today. I am embracing being overwhelmed.

Today I:
talked with three year olds. They like me, I like them. They like to yell, I don't really. They think when you approach them instead of yelling, you are running to spank them. what a conundrum

sat for 45 minutes inside with a little girl who has an imaginary sister named James ( i asked her how its spelled...its starts with a U) and an anger problem as long as the Mississippi OH and shes been kicked out of THREE preschools for this behavior. We got to the bottom of one problem, shes got a crush on a little boy but the rest? who knows. I told her I put a good girl curse on her today, that somewhere inside theres a good girl! She started to show it a little after that, but who knows. Its frustrating having parents who only talk when something extra is needed.

was told that I didnt look happy. I cant remember a time when I was truly happy about/for myself! Right now I feel as if I've been thrown into the deep end of adulthood and told to keep my head up. Its hard to do right now because I dont feel my floaties. I know they are there, securely on my arms and around my waist. And I can't hear anyone cheering for me to keep going. So I keep slipping under and succumbing to the waves but pulling back up, looking. I don't know what I am to expect but we will see. One day, I'll pop up and someone will be there waiting, hoping to help me stay above, and letting me support them. But till then, Im kicking. Yell if you see me go under


  1. omygosh what a wonderful blog you have! I know how you feel being so overwhelmed. I miss being a kid so much. Saturday morning cartoons, sleepovers, not having to watch what I eat, not having to worry about money... That's the life.
    And you'll get used to the kids - I work at group homes for people with severe disabilities, most of them are for children. You just need to find what works for each child. Looks like your doing a good job of that already. :) Good girl curse! I`m going to use that on my daughter. :)
    Have a good one!

  2. when you feel overwhelmed, breathe and take it one minute at a time, nothing more nothing less!