Hot Tub Confessional

I know, what an odd title. But the time we spent in the hot tub was some of the best on the whole trip! (I say we because few others read this, so I've decided to be inclusive today)
We asked questions and answered truthfully. Some were cute, some were embarassing, some helped us get to know each other just that much better. I absolutely loved that, it meant no means a lot to me that we were able to share our thoughts so openly with each other.
My last question was "How is your relationship with God?". I asked because I didn't know. We are at a Christian school and call ourselves such but generally we don't know how each others spiritual lives are doing which is something I have always been saddened about.
I have to admit, I lied. I said that I am angry with God...which is true but becuase of that, I do talk to Him more. I let him know what happened that day and am doing my best to learn how to rely on him more and more. I know that is key to openeing up and doing so much more for him with my life. I also know that prayer alone won't help a thing if it isn't backed up by reading scripture. I love to read just never the right book. I need to discipline myself to reading everyday, past attempts have failed simply because of my lack of discipline. Not this time.

I just don't know if I'm ready for what happens when I finally listen.