I am
-unfeeling
-self-absorbed
and apparently ive become callous
i have surrounded myself with people who dont encourage me. purposefully
im not willing to feel

im hurting, i hurt for others, i hurt because the person who told me this is my mother, i hurt because if anything not wanting to feel is a struggle and not something to be harped on. I hurt because i dont know how to respond to someone who has been busy most of my life wanting in on something so incredibly personal (to be fair, so has my dad...to be fair im quite used to it)

so im taking off for a few days. im not going anywhere, im just not going to be online. deleted fb, wont be tweeting....you can contact me if you so choose. which you wont and thats fine. im just having a hard time dealing with this and dealing publicly is rarely wise